Hate to Remember//
Note: Not based on any events that have taken place in my life; don't judge.
Dedication: This story, although emo/very/slightly depressing, is dedicated to MD. One day, D! Yay! Happy Early Birthday to one of my lovely best friends. ♥
Sorry if it depresses you, I hope you like it. (:
It’s been too long.
You’ve grown a few inches and I’ve grown none. You obviously haven’t gotten a haircut in what seems like a year; your hair long and shaggy, hiding your deep brown eyes. You see me, smile and ask how summer went. Fine, thanks, and you? I ask. You don’t elaborate much; you never have, it’s just your nature. When you’re finished you tell me that you need to go, but that you’ll see me around.
I get it. You always go.
- - - - -
The next time I see you is in South Hall. You’re walking down the only staircase there (the school really needs more staircases…) and laughing at something one of your friends said. I love it when you laugh; there’s always something about that pure joy on your face that gets me.
I’ve missed you. It’s been about three weeks; we’ve got different lunch periods, no classes together.
You see me, smile, wave, what’s up?, and then inform me that you’ve got your next class and you’re super busy, but you’ll catch me later.
I know. You always catch me later.
- - - - -
It’s been a month, now. I’ve thought about you occasionally. Not always.
This is a good sign. A wonderful one, according to my best friend. I see you playing soccer. You were always good at soccer. You made fun of me the only time that I tried to; you said all my goals were flukes.
You see me. I predict you’ll give me that handsome smile, wave that hand that would fit perfectly in my own, and then move those soft lips that could be on mine. Could.
I wonder if I should consider becoming a fortune teller.
- - - - -
Shockingly, it’s only been a week. I see you in the library. You’re next to her, sitting on the windowsill, just talking. I don’t know her name; I’ve never seen her before. She’s pretty, I decide. I’m fairly sure you’ve decided that as well.
Then you look up, but you don’t catch my eye. It’s her that has caught your eye, only her.
You move in closer to her, and I feel my world moving in on me. Your lips—they collapse on hers. It’s a sweet kiss. She presses her lips against yours, and then you place your hand, the one that would fit perfectly in mine, on her cheek.
I’m fairly sure that you’re both wondering what that deafening thump thump is. It’s my heart, taking its final beats before it shatters.
I wonder if you love her. As I watch you kiss her, I remember what it was like to have you do that to me.
I hate to remember. It means I’m not forgetting, even though you obviously are.
Final Notes: As I said before, this was not based on anything that happened in my life. It was more of inspired by someone close to me. Also, it is inspired by the song Come On Get Higher by: Matt Nathanson.